Tag Team Tease
by RicardianScholar Clark-Weasley
Summary: Set in a potential post series 2 universe. In which Marinette almost wishes Chloe was their enemy again, Chloe and Alya team up to tease Marinette about Adrien, and Adrien just wishes there was another boy on the team.


There was a time in her life where Marinette never once thought there could be anything worse than Chloe being her usual bitchy self.

She was wrong.

After Chloe went through a painstakingly long redemption - which she still went back on occasionally when she spoke without thinking – and became Queen Bee, and helped Alya (who also happened to be the new and improved and better liked Volpina) reveal everyone's identities to one another, Chloe and Alya suddenly became good friends with a common goal.

To torment Marinette about her love life.

Or rather, more accurately, the _lack_ of Marinette's love life.

With their identities revealed forcibly by their best friends, Adrien and Marinette stumbled through a painfully awkward conversation that resulted in Marinette being firmly friend-zoned….by herself.

She's still not sure how she managed that.

No one else was sure either. Chloe had declared it the most spectacularly stupid thing she had ever witnessed and what made it worse was that Alya and all of the kwamis agreed wholeheartedly.

And since then the pair of them sought out ways to tease Marinette about Adrien…..

"We should train after school," Alya sad bossily, one early morning where Marinette had miraculously managed to get in early for once, "It took far too long yesterday to defeat the Akuma. We're a team of four excellent, kick-ass, heroes, it shouldn't have taken half a day to defeat one measly Akuma."

"To be fair," Marinette protested, "it was a very sneaky and tricky Akuma."

Chloe snorted rudely at that as she shoved herself between Alya and Marinette. "Oh _puh_ -lease!" Chloe drawled out. "We would have nabbed that Akuma in half the time if a certain _someone_ wasn't too busy flirting with Chat Noir."

"I-I-I-Wh-you- _urgh!_ " Marinette spluttered out incoherently. She felt her cheeks heat up in embarrassment much to her ever-lasting shame. " _We were not flirting_!" she managed to choke out. "We were discussing battle tactics."

"Yeah," Alya snorted, "and pigs fly past here every Tuesday."

"We were!"

"You were _not,_ " Alya rolled her eyes, "for a start the pair of you were all over each other."

"Calling each other disgustingly sickening pet names," Chloe added, "looking nauseatingly in love with one another."

"An asteroid could have been heading right towards us and you two wouldn't have noticed because you were that into one another," Alya said, "In fact Chat Noir was hit several times and didn't notice _at all_ because he was too busy watching you bat your eyelashes at him."

" _I don't bat my eyelashes_!" Marinette squeaked.

"Oh you so bat your eyelashes," Chloe smirked, "and twirl your hair. Like a breathless schoolgirl."

" _I do not twirl my hair_!" Marinette squawked. "What sort of flirt do you think I am?!"

"So you admit it," Alya said slyly, "you were flirting."

"I WAS NOT FLIRTING!"

"You were _totally_ flirting, in fact," Alya suddenly halted to a stop and grabbed Chloe by the shoulders. "This is what you two looked like," she then forced Chloe to look at her as she leaned in close as if she was about to kiss Chloe (both Chloe and Marinette looked disgusted at this). "Don't worry Bugaboo," Alya purred out in a deep baritone, "I will keep you safe."

Realisation flashed over Chloe's face and then a particularly evil smirk blossomed over her lips. "Oh _Chat Noir_!" Chloe cried out in a breathless voice. "You're so handsome and strong, how could I ever live without you?"

Marinette gagged and pulled a face at that. "All right," she gritted out, "first, I _do not_ sound like that, and secondly-"

"Never fear _Purr_ -incess!" Alya slid her hands down to Chloe's waist and pulled Chloe close. "I have nine lives remember. You'll never have to live without me."

Marinette wished she could say that Adrien would never say that. She really did. But that would be the biggest lie of the century.

"Oh!" Chloe trilled sweetly as she batted her eyelashes rapidly. " _Hot Stuff_!"

Marinette choked on hr own spit at that. " _You told her_!" she hissed at Alya.

Marinette suddenly felt incredibly betrayed. Chloe might actually be likable now and Alya and Chloe now had a sacred partnership as Volpina and Queen Bee, but that didn't change the fact that this was a secret between Marinette and Alya and it hadn't been that long since Chloe changed.

"Girl," Alya rolled her eyes exasperatedly. "You told her at our sleepover a week ago. Now hush," she made a shushing gesture, "you're making me break out of character." Marinette felt her own face contort, _literally_ contort, in anger. _This wasn't funny_! "Oh dear My Lady," Alya switched back to the deep baritone, "I see an Akuma heading our way. Allow me to carry you away to safety."

And then with the blatant abuse of her newfound super-strength, Alya scooped Chloe up in her arms and the pair of them dashed down the corridor cackling like a pair of witches.

Several of their classmates watched with wide panicked filled eyes…they were still waiting for the other signs of the apocalypse.

" **ARGH**!" Marinette screamed. "WE DON'T SOUND LIKE THAT!"

"YES YOU DO!" Alya and Chloe both shouted back in unison.

Marinette wondered if she would get detention for property damage if she bashed her head repeatedly against the lockers until this all seemed like one hellish nightmare…

MLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLB

Chat Noir was still getting used to being part of a team of four.

It was still a little weird knowing that he didn't have to take all of the hits and he could hold off on using cataclysm for a little longer than usual. It was also incredibly weird trying to work with Volpina and Queen Bee who were completely different to the dynamic he and Ladybug had created in the last year.

"Queenie!" Volpina barked as she barely dodged the Akuma's attack. "Will you stop squealing and sting this bloody thing?!"

"My hair is _ruined!"_ Queen Bee wailed as she tried to smooth her hair back into its immaculate ponytail. "The Akuma ruined my hair!"

"It's _hair!_ " Ladybug snapped impatiently. "You can fix it later! Akuma now, hairdressers when Paris has been saved."

"But-"

"Queen Bee," Ladybug interrupted before the black and yellow striped hero could make her complaint, "I promise you my Miraculous Ladybug will cure your hair," Ladybug and Volpina both rolled their eyes at this and Chat actually wondered if the headache he could feel brewing was actually an aneurysm. "But first I need you to sting this Akuma!"

"All right," Queen Bee suddenly composed herself as that cold, cruel, look with the evil glint in her eye that usually appeared when she was about to humiliate someone crossed her face. "Let's make this Akuma pay!"

" _For God sake it's just hair_!"

Thankfully, Queen Been didn't hear Ladybug's remark as she dived in for an attack, and after a few hits from Volpina, a cataclysm from Chait Noir, and a well-timed catch and purification from Ladybug, Paris was saved once more.

Chat Noir immediately turned and met Ladybug's eyes with a grin. She smiled back radiantly as she held her fist up. After the first couple, disastrous, celebratory attempt with Volpina and Queen Bee, he was pleased to say that the two newer members held back to let Chat Noir and Ladybug have their victory fist-bump alone before they added their own high-fives.

Chat's cheeks heated up slightly as he felt the usual fluttery sensations in his stomach when his fist grazed Ladybug's. they held the pose for a few seconds as he drank in the beauty of Ladybug's blue eyes and that sweet pink flush on her cheeks, and her lovely –

"Mwah! Mwah! Mwah!" Chat Noir and Ladybug froze with matching mortified facial expressions as they realised Queen Bee and Volpina were standing right beside them with their lips puckered up as they made mocking kiss noises. "Mwah! Mwah! Mwah! Mwah! Mwah! Mwah Mw-"

"THAT'S IT!" Ladybug shrieked as she flushed a deep, bright, red that matched her suit. "I'M GOING TO _**KILL**_ YOU TWO!"

Queen Bee and Volpina screamed, and laughed, as they suddenly ran off in the opposite direction. Ladybug growled furiously as she snatched up her yoyo and flew after them.

Chat Noir was left in the dust staring after his friends with a bewildered expression.

What the hell just happened?

MLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLB

Nino was surprised to find Adrien on the other side of his front door. After all, when he wasn't busy with his insane schedule, Adrien tended to spend all of his free time with Marinette these days.

"Hey dude," Nino said cheerfully, "What's up?"

"Nothing, nothing," Adrien said with a fake smile, "I just had some free time and thought we could hang."

"Come on, dude," Nino shook his head, "it's me. You can tell me _anything._ So what's really up?"

"Well…" Adrien said hesitatingly. "You know that they said girls are more mature?" Adrien asked.

"…yeah?" Nino frowned in confusion. "What about it?"

"Well they _lied_!"

As if to prove Adrien's point Volpina and Queen Bee chose that very moment to leap across the roof tops opposite Nino's house giggling like a pair of lunatics while Ladybug chased after them screaming furiously.

Adrien sighed heavily.

He hoped Master Fu will send a boy hero to join the team….and soon.


End file.
